 (ARA) - Defiant, "mouthy," out-of-control kids seem to be everywhere these days. If your child is one of them, it can be frustrating, tiring and demoralizing dealing with daily arguments, acting out and outright aggression. But it is possible to instill a sense of personal accountability and respect in your disrespectful child, whether he's 8 or 18.
"It's true that kids today face more temptations and challenges than their parents and grandparents did when they were growing up," says behavioral therapist James Lehman. "But the principles of good parenting are constant and universal. Whether you're a parent, step-parent or grandparent raising a challenging child, help is out there."
Every child acts out on occasion; challenging authority is a normal part of growing up. How can you tell when acting out is more than just testing boundaries, but a sign of a real problem? You'll know you need help if:
* Your child is constantly disrespectful, obnoxious or even abusive towards you and others.
* You argue with her constantly.
* You "walk on eggshells" around him, avoiding conflicts that you know will "set him off."
* You've tried screaming, punishing, pleading and negotiating and still your child walks all over you.
* The child's behavior affects the whole family, creating unhappiness and hostility among family members.
Forget the psycho babble you may have read or heard that focuses on analyzing a child's feelings or self-esteem, Lehman says. What children really need to improve their behavior is a better way to solve their problems than the objectionable methods they currently use.
The key to improving a child's behavior is instilling in him or her an understanding of personal accountability, says Lehman, a self-confessed former disrespectful child. As a therapist who has worked with hundreds of out-of-control kids, Lehman has helped families improve children's behavior for more than 30 years.
"Parents of difficult children hear it all the time - 'This child needs structure,' " he says. "But what does that mean and how do you create it in your home?"
Lehman created the Total Transformation Program to teach parents, grandparents, step-parents and caregivers simple step-by-step techniques for giving children and teens the structure they need to improve their behavior immediately. More than 125,000 people have chosen the system.
Through a user friendly multi-media program, parents learn:
* The 10 words to say when your child gets mouthy.
* How to instantly halt an argument.
* How to end fighting and acting out in public.
* A word-by-word script to get children to take responsibility for their own behavior.
* How to use consequences to modify behavior.
* How to help children find better ways than back-talk, screaming, blaming or acting out to solve their problems.
In addition to these life-altering techniques, the program offers a live Parental Support Line, where parents and other caregivers can receive expert advice specific to their situations from people who are experts in the program.
To order The Total Transformation and begin instilling in your child the problem-solving techniques that will lead to better behavior, visit www.TheTotalTransformation.com.
For a free 30-day trial of the Total Transformation system that will instill in your child the problem-solving skills that lead to better behavior, visit www.TheTotalTransformation.com.
Copyright © 2008, ARAnet, Inc.
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